Nov 3, 2011
Gasp..! Puff…! Breathe! Gasp…! Two extra hours in a day? OMG…OMG! Dear Diary, I am welling over with emotion. Sniffle! This is such an emotional moment. I can’t believe this is happening. Before you think I am some kind of retard, let me tell you about my moment of extra-terrestrial communication today morning. No, by extra-terrestrial I do not mean communication with aliens. (Grow up dude.) I spoke with God dammit! Ya.. ya…you won’t believe it and extra-terrestrial is not the right word, but listen..this is what happened.
I was in my room today morning doing my 3 surya namaskars. Don’t laugh. Try doing 3 surya namaskars and you will know how tiring that is. My poor feet…! So..where was I? Ya… it was 9.30 a.m. Look I am tired of your giggling. Yes I do surya namaskars at 9.30 a.m. There I said it. Now shut your mouth and listen. So in the middle of the 2nd surya namaskar I heard somebody calling my name. I looked around from under my belly, the world looking weird upside down, but couldn’t see anybody at the door. I continued with the namaskars when I heard it again. I am still hungover from yesterday night’s drinking, I thought and continued to the Kapalbhati. (Ramdev effect you see.)
I had shut my eyes and was trying hard to ignore the growling of my empty tummy as I squeezed my abdomen muscles in and out, in and out, when I saw a blinding light, right in the middle of my forehead. What the F..?! I almost fell back on the floor. This is crazy I thought and went to the bathroom to splash my face with some water. I should get a health check-up soon I muttered as I walked back to my yoga mat to continue with the Kapalbhatis.
I started slowly this time, my tummy providing background score with its growling. Then the light flashed.. again, blindingly this time and I heard the voice calling my name clearly. I couldn’t open my eyes. It was as if my eyelids were stuck together with feviquick. “Pallavi daughter…” the voice said. My jaw dropped open. All I could see was the blinding light. The voice seemed to come from somewhere deep inside my head. Now I realised that I couldn’t move…not even a limb! “Don’t be afraid, I am your supreme father,” the voice said. Haan..? My father is back at home and he speaks to me over the mobile phone not from inside my head, I thought. The voice seemed to know what I was thinking. “No, I am not your biological father. I am the father of your father, of everyone you know,” it said. Grandpa, I thought. “No stupid child. Don’t you get it? I am God, the supreme father of all creations,” the voice said. God…? God…! GOD…? Ha ha ha ha I went. PATAAAAK! One tight slap landed on my right cheek. Owwww I sobbed, tears welled in my eyes but wouldn’t fall, I couldn’t move but my cheek burned. Now I was listening. “Look child, I do not have much time to spare, but this is what I came to do. I heard your prayer yesterday while you were submitting your assignment and was moved by your tears. You wished there had been at least an extra hour in the day so that you could complete the assignment and looked up to me and asked why I don’t listen to your prayers. Hmmmm…I am going beyond protocol and giving you not one, but two extra hours today. Study, write, do your assignments, whatever you want in those two extra hours, but do not tell anyone. If you do, I will be angry…very angry. If I feel you deserve it, I might even give you extra two hours every day for the rest of your life. Now get to work and don’t ever say I do not listen to your prayers.” The blinding light dimmed and then vanished altogether. My ears were buzzing and sensation returned to my limbs. I could move and I jumped up shrieking. I must have fallen asleep, I thought and pinched myself hard. But it wasn’t necessary..My right cheek was still burning and I could see in the mirror that it had turned a bright red. Did I just speak to god? Did I just speak to GOD I asked myself and almost ran to the door to tell my flatmates what I had seen and heard. I stopped in my tracks.. He had said he will be angry. Brrrrrr…. No, I won’t tell anyone I thought and shivered.
Then the realisation set in. I have two extra hours today? How can it be possible I scoffed! But…but..he said…and he is the creator. A shiver ran down my spine. Ok…cool..relax..I told myself. I then had the following soliloquy. “Breathe. So I am supposed to have an extra two hours today. It didn’t look like he was kidding, proof my right cheek. So I only have to wait and see whether it’s true. So if I am supposed to have 26 hours today, then it would end tomorrow morning. Wow! But how can I count if I will be sleeping by then. I do not wake up till 9! No, no I can’t let that happen. Idea! Let me eat and sleep now, and then wait from night to morning to see if the clock stops for me.” It made sense. I clapped my hands in delight and ran to the kitchen to get some breakfast. I met my flatmate there and almost broke the news. Then my right cheek stung and I clasped both hands over my mouth and ran out of the kitchen. It was tougher than I expected. I went to the kitchen again when I was sure no one was around and gobbled some food. I came back to my room and hit the bed. I had a mission to accomplish. But I couldn’t sleep, try as I might I couldn’t. I day dreamed for a while, tossed around for some more, listened to music and finally decided to write this diary entry.. I must have drifted off around 1 ‘o’ clock.
Nov 4, 2011
I woke up to hear someone banging on my door. Oh crap! My mouth tasted odd, the room was dark and I felt lethargic. I started to get up but plopped back on the bed again. Then I remembered my right cheek. Oh shit! God…! Time…! I have to wait I told myself and switched on the lights. It was 10 p.m. oh great, at least I woke up; I thought and opened the door of my room. It was my flatmate, come to check if I was all right. “I am ok..just a headache, so I slept,” I lied to her and came back to the room. I was hungry and I didn’t have food in the fridge. Damn I had to cook! I cooked some sambhar and rice and joined my flatmates in watching the cricket match on TV. When I finally escaped to my room it was cindrella time. 12! Perfect, now I could wait. But what would I do all the while waiting. Oh! He told me to study, I should complete the assignment maybe, I thought and opened my books. I do not know how the next few hours passed but when I came back to my senses I was sleeping with my head on my textbook, drool all over the pages. F#@! I jumped up and looked at the time. It was 3.30 a.m. Ouch! There is no stronger lullaby then a textbook, I thought and went to the bathroom to freshen up. Maybe I should have a shower, I considered; that would fully wake me up.
I emerged from the shower to see the first rays of the sun piercing the night sky. Wow! I have never seen a real sunrise before, I gasped and opened the curtains to savour the scene. I watched mesmerised as the sun rays shone, meekly at first, changing colours from gold to red to finally brilliant yellow. Wow! It’s good to be alive, I exclaimed and with the smile still on my face gazed at the clock. It was 6.10 a.m. Woah! Just a few hours more, I told myself and sat at my study table. I did not feel like opening my books again. Maybe I will listen to some music, I decided and booted the laptop. The next few hours flew by with Facebook, twitter, Youtube and WordPress. I left enigmatic messages on ‘love of God’ on each one of the sites. When I checked the time again, it was 9! I couldn’t contain my excitement. Lesser than an hour to go; I began my vigilance of the clock.
True to his word, the clock stopped at 9.40 a.m. and stayed that way. I couldn’t get enough of looking at the clock in amazement and I stared and stared. After a long, long time the hands of the clock moved again. I jumped up laughing, bobbing up and down in delight. It happened, it happened I shouted. I was still hopping about when the blinding light struck my eyes. I shrieked and I heard the voice thunder. “Fool! Stupid child. What have you done? What did you do with the extra hours I granted you? What did you do with an entire day? You whiled it away. You whiled it away!”
“Sorry Father..” I was sobbing now. I was afraid.
“You didn’t deserve it. This is why I do not grant wishes to you human beings,” he thundered and the light vanished.
I was crying now and was deluged in my tears. I understood what he meant. I was ungrateful and undeserving. I wasted an entire day and an extra two hours. “I will not let it happen again. Sorry Father,” I whispered. I had to make amends. I dragged myself back to my study table, opened my books and slogged over them for the better part of the day. That night I slept peacefully. I dreamt that someone stroked my cheek, but otherwise the night and the following day were uneventful.
Nov 6, 2011
I have just submitted my assignment at the Faculty office, in time and complete. As I was waiting for the University bus to the flat I decided that I would tell people of my experience. It would make him angry but not angrier than he was when he found out I had wasted his gift. It would make him glad to see people realise his presence, his love and use their precious time in the right way. So here it is…I have told you what I did in the extra two hours God granted me and how that taught me to use my time constructively. Cheers!